The Whomping Willows (Blog)

Tomorrow I’ll receive the final master of my new record, When I Was Your Age. Some time before Christmas, this album will be released by DFTBA Records. Most people in my position would be delighted, and I am, but I’m also myself and myself is a person who worries about everything.

Here’s what I’m NOT worried about: the album itself. It rocks. 

Here’s what I am worried about: I suck at YouTube. Occasionally I try to be good at it and manage to come up with a decent video, but for the most part I’m content to sit and talk plainly in front of my iMac’s internal camera. DFTBA is basically a YouTube label, and its artists are proficient at creating content on a regular basis, editing their videos to look as professional as possible, and putting out a product that’s accessible to a lot of people. I’m proficient at none of these things. And fans of DFTBA Records artists have come to expect that their favorite bands will be proficient at these things.

The positive-thinking part of my brain tells me that I’ll be bringing a unique set of skills and perspective to the label and injecting it with a new energy. Unfortunately, the positive thinking part of my brain is as soft-spoken and polite as I am. The negative-thinking part of my brain happens to be pretty obnoxious, and it’s telling me that I’ll remain a blip on the radar of Nerdfighteria, known mostly for being the chubby guy who managed to marry Lauren Fairweather.

I also have the logical part of my brain, which tells me that the negative-thinking part of my brain is probably right, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. First off, I married Lauren Fairweather, and that’s pretty fucking awesome. Also, I’ve just written and recorded the best album I’ve ever made, by a long shot, and that will remain true regardless of the album’s success. It’s never been about the numbers for me, and it shouldn’t be about the numbers now.

But wanting your new record to sell well isn’t the same thing as being obsessed or (even remotely concerned) with numbers. Album sales do translate to dollars, but they also translate to more important things. For me, the process of making music has always been self-serving to some degree. I make music because I have to make music. It’s my primary means of expressing myself, venting my frustration, and sharing my perspective with other people. However, over four and a half years of touring, making music has become much less one-sided. I really love the process of connecting directly with fans, getting to know them as real people, and letting them know that I’m also a real person. This desire to connect has made its way from the show setting to the songwriting process, and my music has become an act of exposition: I want to tell a story, and I want that story to have a substantial impact on anyone who listens to it.

If there’s one thing I know about Nerdfighters, it’s that they’re the cream of the young adult crop in our society. Nerdfighters are artists and thinkers and dreamers and optimists and activists, thanks to mentors like John and Hank Green. I couldn’t ask for a better target audience for this new album. I truly believe that any Nerdfighter who listens to this album will find it relatable, insightful, and enjoyable. My main question is: will they listen to it?

I really have no idea. And that question really won’t be answered for another two months.

Aggggghhhhhhhh.